I don't even know what I want to say tonight but I know that the only way to get better at writing is by writing.
And the only way to get better at honesty is by being honest.
And the only way to get better at connecting with people is by connecting.
And so I am learning. For real, like with reading a book about not just talking (communication) but now to connect. And it is humbling. Because communication is something we all need to do, just like we all need to eat. But just because we all need to eat doesn't mean we all make these amazing choices every time we put something in our mouths.
Sometimes we eat chips and salsa.
Sometimes we eat a gourmet meal.
Sometimes it's popcorn (sometimes it's burned).
And lots of times it is spaghetti, because you find what works and you and you run with it. Until you need to find another meal that is a staple.
The same is true with communication. There once was a time that communication with my boys was as simple as sitting and watching Toy Story with them and drawing pictures of Dr. Sly. And now with them as teens I feel like I'm constantly trying to figure out how to teach them how what they say and do matters. And I want them to feel loved and valued. And know they have so much potential. And when they just settle for a 'crap meal' of ramen I feel like they are missing out on the potential of being hungry for something better.
And so this isn't a post about food...it's just the best analogy I can make on a Monday back after Spring break. It's really about wanting the best for the people I love in so many ways, and yet having to realize we all are human and we all satisfy our hungers through the process of getting it right some days and getting it really wrong some days.
And I hope when I read this post in the future I will know what this jumbled mess of analogies means and realize this journey we are on together is a beautiful crazy mess that is full of blessings and trials and hurts and joys. And the whole of it is truly where we can most find God's best.
